Our First Week As 8

 Our journey back to Colombia has been nothing but blessing...tasting and seeing the goodness and kindess of a Father in heaven who has made a way for our family.  That doesn't mean there is not loss or hurts.  Adoption comes with a cost that weighs heavy on the heart.  

I saw the cost when Silas said goodbye to his bio brother and birth mother once again. I felt the weight of what he has held in his heart. The tears on the otherside of the taxi,  a whisper of a heart wrestling, "mom, is it ok that I am not crying.  They are so sad."  I felt it when we took our kids back to their institution where they all lived before placed in our arms.  Our sweet Caroline, wanting so badly a morsel of her story, little Marta, not being able to sit still for 2 seconds because she was uneasy there and here nose wouldn't stop bleeding.  A first born who would have loved to have seen her birthmom but not possible because she's too far from our region.

 But, God has met them.  He enters in, and the weight then falls on Him.  I could have never dreamed up his ways.  The most precious time with birthfamily...information given to all of Caroline's questions about her long lost friends...our little holding her own even though she never knows what is coming next...and our big, well, she's definitely the big...can not believe the young lady she is becoming, and so gracious about waiting to see her birth mom...

That was just the first 3 days....now this...I can not type without tears because what God is doing with our 2 new kids is blowing me away.  I let my mind go back to taking Isabel home almost 14 years ago.  While we were taking her home, this most precious boy, who is now our son was born into a very hard life...and he and his little sister lived in that hard for several years until one day they were placed in a loving foster home.  We were told foster care in Colombia is terrible, well, I dare say we must have had the best foster mom in the land.  The love was poured in to our new kids.  The healing that has taken place from all their hard and hurts...she was/is amazing.  They were well prepared for our family.  But, again, the loss, I can not take.  They literally drove from their foster home of over 5 years into our arms.  So brave.  So trusting. Meek yet warm.  Grateful. Respectful.  Courageous.  Why? How can they do this?  Because a new life gives them hope and future.  The foster mom did not think they would ever be adopted.  She assumed they were too old to be chosen.  It's all she desired for them.  In Colombia once you hit a certain age, if you do not have a forever family you are on the streets.

So here we are. Our 4 being knit together with our new 2.  How does this work? How is this possible?  How is it that John and I could love and make space for 2 more?  How is it that my son of 11 years is so gracious when his new brother comes up to me and gives me a hug or puts his arm around me when we are walking? - My heart...these 2 boys.  They are so precious together.   Or my girls give me space to sit with their new sister and brush her hair and giggle with her?    Only Jesus...I have no other explanation.  Adoption makes no sense without Him.  His love never fails me.  It overwhelms me.

There is nothing glamerous about this.  But, it's beautiful.  There should be nothing easy about this...but my God, he makes the rough places smooth. If I boast, may I boast in Christ.  My wealth is in the cross.  

He loves His children.  He makes a way for them. But, we need to be willing to enter in...it's what He did, when we follow Him...He makes a way, and He certainly makes all things new!


Do pray continued healing in Juan Camilo and Arelly Vane's heart.  Pray for their foster mom.  I can not imagine. John is getting run down - he left with a bad cold, but, could be bronchitis.  Thank you village.  We could not do this without your prayers.  So much love for each of you!