It's been a Year...We love you Caroline and Martita!!

I haven't been much of a blogger since we've arrived home from Colombia last February, life has been so full!  Tomorrow we are celebrating 1 year that our little girls joined our family...my mind and heart have been going back to our time in Colombia ( l love that land and people), and all that God has done since then...it really is overwhelming when I slow down and let my mind go back...

Adoption can be full of surprises...it's funny what goes through your mind when you receive pictures of your children before you meet them.  I can remember feeling so much joy when Tia Isabel emailed me the below pictures, days before we left to travel.  I would look at them and remind myself not to set expectations...but, still thought, aww...Caroline looks so sweet.  She must be a little chubby 3 1/2 year old, quiet, gentle, and shy. It's easy to put an image in your mind and assume that is how it is going to be...and Marta, poor baby, I need to get to you...being "institutionalized" really appears to have affected you!  Reality is Caroline is not the shy, chubby  little girl...although, very cute and gentle, she is outgoing, happy, and as petite as they come...I was correct with Marta.  Living in an institution has really effected her.  I soon learned that her arm up in the picture shows that she was very stressed out just having her picure taken...but, it did not take long and we discovered a very expressive (even though she has few words) stubborn, strong-willed baby girl...and has a personality that catches more attention everywhere we go...she is such a fun lover, and I did not see that in the pictures.  Some surprises with adoption are incredible...others can be painful...

Marta at 19 months

Caroline in November 2009

These below photos of Caroline were taken random at her orphanage...had I seen these before we adopted her...I would have seen a totally different girl...

Funny, what a little stinker and social butterfly she was there, and during our time with her in Colombia...

I've said it over and over, Los Pisingos is an amazing foundation...but, it is not a home.  Just the other night Caroline said to me..."Mommy, I didn't like bath time at Pisingos.  The Tias pushed me into a freezing cold bath and I cried and cried."   It wasn't the Tias fault...they had to push 30 little kids through the baths, and of course, warm water was not afforded at the orphanage.  Amazing how flashback memories come up periodically throughout a typical day...

This last year has definitely been the most challenging and rewarding all at the same time for me.  Don't get me wrong, Isabel and Silas' journey's bring back so much "warm fuzzy" wonderful times...they were so easy, and the love and joy they brought in to our home is indescribable!  We just had our post-placement visit with our caseworker, and I told her I could do this again.  (I don't know...we are not pursuing it anytime in the near future...it will always be on my heart...) I told her if I ever were to do this again, I would not pursue a little baby, but, an older child.  There is just something about having Jesus meet you in the "mess" of these little bundles past...and slowly watch His redeeming love break through, bringing light and hope where there was once darkness and pain.  It is real stuff, and it comes with a cost. We have been pruned, refined, tested, exhausted...overwhelmed...and yet, I still continue to be dazzled by God's goodness in my life!  Everyone always hears my perspective (simply because John doesn't enjoy being on the computer)...but, he would be the first to tell you this has been one of the most difficult years he has ever been through-much harder on him than myself...but, our God is so good and pursues us in a way that we need to pursue each other...Caroline and Marta are His kids, a gift from our Makers hand!  God has used them to keep our gaze on Him, to abide in Him each day...and to experience first hand the power of His love! How could we not experience all of this?!  His heart is for the orphan, and I am continually amazed that He chose me to have a front row seat into their lives! We (John, Isabel, Silas, and I) are all better because Caroline and Marta are a part of our family! 

"Oh Happy Adoption Day!"